We Will Rock You
by Ichi89
Summary: Hogwarts is holding a talent show, what is it that Neville and the others want to preform? Why is the Great Hall filled with so much...noise?


Title: We Will Rock You  
>Pairing: None<br>Summary: Hogwarts is holding a talent show, what is it that Neville and the others want to preform? Why is the Great Hall filled with so much...noise?  
>Warning: Totally crack...well written crack I hope...but crack none the less...<br>Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of its related material. Also I do not own the rights to Queen's song "We Will Rock You". The idea for this little snippet is pretty much just something my family and I came up with randomly.

Neville sat next to Harry in the Great Hall, the two were pouring over two pieces of printed out paper, Harry's fingers tapping out a familiar three beat tune. To any one who passed them it seemed like they were just studying, and really they were. Though it wasn't for any class that they were studying. The paper in Neville's hands had lyrics printed out while Harry's had notes. Not many knew what it was that they were looking over and they refused to say anything when asked. Instead they would exchange identical grins before shrugging and looking back over there papers. Only one person knew of their plans, and she was sworn to secrecy. See, this year at Hogwarts Dumbledore decided to do something to ease the tension and promote healthy competition. What was it? Why a talent show of course, best performance got 200 points for their house. As it stood that could very well put even the fourth place house, Ravenclaw at the moment, in first.

Hermione watched the two, Harry still tapping out the beat while Neville mouthed words silently, and all she could do was smile. "Are you two still sure you want to do this?"

"Why wouldn't we 'Mione?" Neville asked as he stopped looking over the lyrics in favor for meeting his friends gaze. "Besides what better way to get people pumped up right?"

"Well yes but,"

"Come on Hermione it's going to be fun. Besides if I'm learning guitar for this stupid talent show we're doing a song I actually like." Harry laughed, his hand stilling finally. Both boys' faces held identical grins as they took their stuff and stood. "I'm gonna go practice while I still can, tomorrows the big day."

"Alright, remember to put up the silencing spells so no one can find out what you're doing!" Hermione called after the two, only getting a wave from over Nevilles head. Sighing she shook her head. She still could hardly believe she had helped them.

Xx-xXBegin FlashbackXx-xX

_"Hey Hermione, Neville and I need your help." Harry looked at his friend with wide green eyes, the eyes she had a hard time saying no to, the eyes he **knew** she hated. _

_Sighing Hermione tilted her head and gave him a pointed look. "This had better be good, Harry." Of course upon her words Neville popped up beside Harry, looking...almost giddy._

_"Oh it is, so you know the talent show coming up?" Harry questions, of course before she could respond he continued. "Well see Neville and I want to do this song, but we need your help. We need the lyrics and any music sheets. Think you could write your mum and dad for them?" His voice was rather rushed as he spoke but Hermione could still make it out well enough._

_"Depends, what song is it?"_

_"Oh it's one you'll like." Neville grinned as he leaned forward to whisper in her ear._

Xx-xXEnd FlashbackXx-xX

The next evening the Great Hall was filled with staff and students, many excited about what was going to go on. The line up wasn't much really. A couple of people where singing. Luna was going to be reading some poetry she had written, Colin had even decided to show wizards things that muggles called...'magic tricks'. Needless to say the night was...promising. It started with Cho; dressed in a long kimono with her face painted white and hair pulled up. She sang a rather oddly chilling song, her voice crooning as she strummed on an old looking shamizen. Her performance seemed to send chills down people spines, it really was good. When she was done she bowed and made her way off stage.

Next up Colin. His performance was more comical than anything else. Pulling a long rope of handkerchiefs out of his sleeve he cupped his hand and began stuffing it in. Stuffing it down with his thumb he then pulled his hand away and showed them both, the handkerchiefs having 'magicaly' disappeared. The thing was, on his opposite hand, it was easy to tell he had on a fake thumb, seeing as the corner of a green cloth was poking out. Making a sheepish smile he his hands behind his back. It went on like that and soon it was obvious that he hadn't been serious about any of it, he had meant for it to be funny,

After a few more performances, one of which was Dean showing off his football skills by doing a few tricks with a ball and not using his hands, Harry and Neville came onto the stage. The Hall went silent as they set up, Harry having a magically power 'electric' guitar and Neville simply casting sonarus on himself. Looking back at Harry Neville waited until the other nodded before he stomped twice, then clapped. The next time he did this Harry copied. A few gasps issued from students, the next round more joining in, grins lighting up many of the muggleborn and muggle-raised students faces. It wasn't long before the noise was thundering.

"What? Longbottom has the 'talent' of inducing a mob to make a racket?" Malfoy rolled his eyes as he watched the two, blinking as suddenly Neville's voice was heard. His singing voice much deeper than his regular.

"Buddy your a boy, making big noise playing in the street, gonna be a big man some day. You got mud on you're face, you big disgrace. Kicking your can all over the place! Singin-!" Neville grinned as he cut off at the chorus, though even as he did the song did not stop. Instead every muggleborn and muggle-raised student sand as one.

"We will, we will ROCK YOU! We will, we will ROCK YOU!" The students sang, screamed, and hollered together.

This brought a startled reaction from everyone else, many among the staff sat with wide, shocked eyes. Though at least two of their number found the entire thing very amusing, those two where Dumbledore and Professor Flitwick. The smaller man was stamping his feet and clapping his hands along with the others while Dumbledore sat, that twinkle ever present in his pale blue eyes.

"Buddy you're a young man, hard man shouting in the street gonna take on the world some day. You got blood on your face, you big disgrace. Wavin' your banner all over the place!" The taller Gryffindor's voice boomed out, clapping as he did. Again the most of the Hall joined in.

"We will, we will ROCK YOU! We will, we will ROCK YOU!"

Draco could be seen covering his ears slightly and wincing at the volume, seeing as he had chosen to sit so close to the bloody stage. "Bloody hell...this isn't music it's-"

"It's rock Malfoy." A halfblood Slytherin rolled his eyes. "Queen to be exact." The teen was clapping, though not as loud as he watched the performance with a bored expression.

"Buddy you're an old man, poor man. Pleadin' with you eyes-"

"Who in their right mind names a band 'Queen' and then sings this?" Draco looked at the other.

"Probably the same kind of people who form an all man group and call it 'Twisted Sister'." The dark haired teen retorted with a roll of the eyes, stopping just in time for the rest of the hall to boom back with the chorus yet again. THough this time the chorus was repeated a few times before a loud hum seemed to start, it volume growing as Harry stepped forward and began a guitar solo. When the solo finished the entire hall, muggleborns, muggle-raise, and even pure bloods all stood clapping as loud as they could. Surprisingly even a few Slytherins were clapping, including Crabbe and Goyle. Though they promptly stopped when they received a rather sharp glare from Draco.

Both Neville and Harry grinned brightly as they hopped off the stage and made their way back to the Gryffindor table. Ron just blinked at Harry, looking as if he thought the two had gone around the bend while Hermione was laughing.

"You two should have seen Snape's face!" She laughed harder, holding her side. "He looked like either he wanted to join in with the others or he wanted to hex one of you...his hands kept twitching." The girl peeled off into giggles before finally regaining control of herself.

"See, now aren't you glad you wrote your parents for us?" Harry chuckled as he looked around, eyes glancing up at the staff table to see Snape sneering at them. The teen ducked his head and laughed to himself. The next few performances came and went but it was easy to see who had won.

Needless to say that year Gryffindor went home with the house cup, like always. After all, who could compete with _Queen_.


End file.
